When Worlds OOC
by Cack
Summary: When people start acting strange, it's up to Naruto and Iruka to figure things out.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1: Love Is In The Air  
  
Naruto was rubbing his head every few moments as he walked to the point Kakashi had told Team 7 to meet at in the woods. He knew that Kakashi would be late but he figured that the one day he decided to show up late himself, Kakashi would be on time and grill him for it. With a sigh of discontent, Naruto rubbed his eyes and continued walking. It was strange, he had a weird sensation in his head, not pain, just... weird. Walking past the trees that were marked to show the way, Naruto saw his team mates Sakura and Sasuke and they were...  
  
"Oh my shit!" Naruto screamed in outrage. There, in the small clearing, his arch-rival Sasuke and the love of his heart, Sakura, were making out the way only two pre-teens could. "Had Sakura done something to melt the ice around Sasuke's heart?" Naruto said aloud. "Wait, what the hell did I just say?" he spoke again, watching the display of awkward tonsil hockey. After a moment they took notice of him.  
  
"Yo, Naruto-kun." Sasuke said with a small wave.  
  
"You!" Naruto pointed an accusing finger at Sasuke, "and you!" he pointed at Sakura, "What the hell is going on here?!" he demanded.  
  
"Didn't you hear, Sasu-kun and I are going out!" Sakura said, cheerfully.  
  
"When did this happen...?" Naruto said, sorrow and disappointment replacing the anger and shock.  
  
"Last night," Sasuke explained, "Saku-chan invited herself over. I made her a nice dinner, and when we finished, I pinned her onto the couch and we had sex! Do you know what this means!"  
  
"...rape?" Naruto hazarded a guess.  
  
"Naruto-baka!" Sakura said cheerfully.  
  
"No silly, because I had sex with her and she didn't say 'no,' it obviously means tru luv!" Sasuke beamed. Before Naruto could make any protests, Kakashi walked into the scene, reading Cum Cum Paradise, as if it was grafted to his person. As if he could not live if this book was not in his hand. As if him and the book shared a symbiotic relationship; Kakashi got his rocks off, and the book was given a sense of fulfillment. As if the best way to characterize Kakashi was by having him read this fucking book, CONSTANTLY. Before Naruto could ask Kakashi the finer details about consensual sex, the jounin half-whispered to himself.  
  
"Ah my dolfin, ware r u?"  
  
"What the hell did you just say?" Naruto asked bluntly.  
  
"lol, nothing ^_^;;" Kakashi replied.  
  
"Wait... did you just... 'say' a facial expression?" Naruto asked, confused.  
  
"hahaha silly baka. n e ways, no traning 4 2 day. I must find my dolfin." Kakashi said.  
  
"Then why did you have us come here today?" Naruto asked, slightly distracted by Sasuke and Sakura's renewed make-out session. Kakashi opted to not answer and walked off to find his 'dolfin,' and the two love-birds continued to be oblivious to everything but one another. Confused and scared, Naruto ran back to Konoha.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ omg sene change lol  
  
Meanwhile, in the desert, Garaa, Temari and Kankuro were standing on a sand dune. They had no reason to be there, its just like, hard to make stuff for them so its totally convinent to have them just be "in the desert" somewheres.  
  
"Fuck its hot out." Kankuro stated the obvious, looking up at the blinding hot sun.  
  
"Well, if you didn't dress liek a faggit black cat then there wouldn't be a problem you homo." Temari snaped back at him.  
  
"You cunt." he replied.  
  
"Both of you, stop being fags." Garaa said in a snarl.  
  
"Garaa you little queer, you should like sleep and smile and shit. It's like you are a total dick for no real reason." Temari said, forgetting that their mother died to allow him the ability to  
  
command sand, or the repeated attacks on his life, or the total alienation during his childhood.  
  
"Haha Temari you showed the little fag." Kankuro laughed.  
  
"Yea I did let's fuck." she replied.  
  
"Sure."  
  
As Kankuro and Temari began to do the nasty, Garaa's eyes bugged out as he watched his older siblings go at it.  
  
"Oh snap sloppy seconds." he said, whipping out his junk and using his aformentioned sand powers to jerk him off.  
  
ilol k R&R no flamez plz! Chappy 2 is coming soon!!!!!!/i 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2: What The Hell Is Going On?!  
  
Naruto was running back to Konoha, feeling creeped out. He needed to talk to someone about what happened with his team mates and Kakashi, and that someone was Iruka. Throughout his run to the village, the strange feeling in his head subsided but was still there, like it was in the back of his mind, waiting for some kind of signal to grow again. Running into the village through the gates, he spotted Rock Lee walking rather stiffly. Naruto slowed to a stop and grabbed him by the shoulders.  
  
"Lee!" Naruto panted, "Have you seen Iruka, the academy instructor, anywhere? I gotta talk to him!"  
  
"Oh, hey Naruto-kun. Sorry, I can't say that I have." Rock Lee walked a few steps away on his toes slightly, like moving his body too much was painful.  
  
"Lee, are you all right? Are you hurt?" Naruto asked, concerned. Lee brushed away Naruto's comment with a small hand wave.  
  
"No, no, not at all. Its just Neji-sama took me by surprise, so I'm a little sore, that's all." Lee explained. Naruto was about to ask just what Rock ment, when he noticed the damp spot on the pants of Lee's green jump suite, as if caused by a liquid...  
  
"You mean you were sparring, right? And that he caused you to bleed a bit... right?"  
  
Naruto asked and hoped at the same time. Lee laughed heartily, then stopped when it started to become too painful.  
  
"No baka, Neji-sama and I are lovers now! Duh! He confessed his feelings for me last night, and needless to say I was a little off-guard!"  
  
"Y-you mean Neji... raped you?!" Naruto said aghast.  
  
"Haha no! Neji-sama may not have asked, but because he did it with love, it was more like... 'surprise-concentual sex.'" Lee explained to a very pale Naruto, who took off like a bullet to find Iruka as fast as he could.  
  
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~~~+~+~ k sene change again lolz  
  
Iruka was running as well, not to, but from, someone. Kakashi was acting... friendly. TOO friendly, and Iruka was going to have none of that or this 'dolfin' crap Kakashi was spouting. So it was by a great coincidence that he happened to bump into Naruto while going down an alleyway.  
  
~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~+~ ok the seens r 1 now lol  
  
"Iruka!" Naruto gasped, before he tackled his old teacher with a hug, "I've been looking all over for you!"  
  
"W-wait a sec Naruto, we need to run!" he said, grabbing Naruto's hand and half-dragging him along. He took a complex series of streets and walkways, eventually ending up at his own house. Inside, Iruka locked all the doors and windows, pulled down the blinds and then turned  
  
some lights on. Finally, he sighed with relief and sat down on his bed. Naruto pulled up a desk chair and straddled it, waiting for Iruka to finish up anything he may have had to do.  
  
"Okay Naruto, we're secure. What is it you wanted?" he asked.  
  
"Things are going crazy!" Naruto exclaimed, "Sasuke and Sakura are making out like there's no tomorrow, Lee and Neji have, uh, found love in one another, and Kakashi is just plain weird," Iruka grimaced when Naruto said Kakashi, "So I came to you, wondering if you knew anything."  
  
"Well... not really..." Iruka said, but before he could continue they both winced at some kind of feeling in their head. Naruto started rubbing his temples, and saw Iruka doing the same.  
  
"You also felt that?" he asked. Iruka nodded.  
  
"I'm not sure why, but everyone is acting differently. Its like... they're becoming characatures of themselves."  
  
"Any ideas on what to do?" Naruto asked, feeling a little defeated.  
  
"It seems pretty wide-spread, so I think we could take it up with the Hokage, if she's not busy."  
  
Naruto nodded in agreement, and the went off together to see the Fifth Hokage (but not before Iruka had Naruto go out first, to check for Kakashi).  
  
~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~```At the Hokage Tsunade's manshun:  
  
The cloaked and masked guards of the Hokage, the Anbu, admitted Iruka and Naruto in, although they assumed it was because she wasn't seeing anyone at the moment, that was rather the contrary. At a table over some cups of tea and pockey (always pockey) the Hokage sat with a young girl.  
  
The girl appeared to be around the age of eighteen, but her beauty looked like that of a woman. Her long, black hair went down to the floor, like a silken curtain that flowed slightly in the small breeze coming from the window. Her eyes were like sapphires, dancing with sparkling light that made them look like the water of a clear lake. A small smile formed on her ruby-red lips when they came in.  
  
"Um..." was all Iruka could say. He felt like he was somehow being drawn to this mysterious woman.  
  
"Iruka. Naruto," Tsunade nodded to each of them, "I would like you to meet a guest of mine. She just got here today. Her name is..."  
  
Dread seemed to fill up in Naruto, as if he didn't really want to know...  
  
"...Meri-Su." the Fifth finished. Naruto felt like ice went shooting up his spine. Iruka acted quite the contrary.  
  
"Oh! Forgive me for not recognizing you, Meri-sama." Iruka bowed, while Naruto looked at him quizitivly, "You won't recognize her Naruto, you're too young to. Before you were born, Meri-sama had single-handedly fought back both the nations of Stone and Clouds... at the same time! Impressive, huh?" Meri-Su blushed slightly under Iruka's words and brought a delicate hand to her face. Naruto looked skeptical.  
  
"So, Meri-san," he began, "how old are you?"  
  
"Why, eighteen, why do you ask?" she said in a musical voice.  
  
"If you fought back the two nations before I was born, that would make you about... six or seven, at the oldest." Naruto pointed out. There was a long silence. The Hokage seemed more perplexed than anything and Meri-Su looked like she was agitated, but Iruka's face looked like  
  
he had dawned on something.  
  
"I-I'm sorry!" he said, bowing deeply, "Naruto is a little sick, please excuse us!"  
  
"I'm not si-ow!" Naruto was interrupted as Iruka grabbed him by the arm and quickly pulled him out of the room. Meri-Su's slight frown of anger went unnoticed by the Hokage.  
  
"They are on to me..." she thought to herself.  
  
Comming soon, the grand finale! omg r&r no flamz plz 


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3: An End To The Madness  
  
"What the heck was that all about?" Naruto asked Iruka after being pulled out of the building. His former teacher looked rather nervous.  
  
"Naruto, I believe that woman in the problem." he said in a serious tone.  
  
"She is strange," Naruto began, "but what makes you think so?"  
  
"A few things. First of all, that strange feeling we experience at my house was a type of genjutsu. It alters the mind that allows the ninja performing it to add false memories into their target. She seems to be some kind of master of it, as she can affect the Hokage." Naruto nodded in agreement.  
  
"But how are we immune to its effect?"  
  
"I think it's due to-" Iruka looked around to make sure no one was close by, "-the nine-tailed fox inside of you. I think it's protecting you from it."  
  
"Okay... but what about you?"  
  
"That I'm not entirely sure about. Maybe because you were seeking me out, you were subconsciously extending the fox's power to me as well."  
  
"I can do that?" Naruto said, a little excited.  
  
"Sorry, it was just a theory. But regardless, we aren't affected by her. Now, the second thing is the way everyone is changing. I think that this is the way she views them, taking their personalities and multiplying them."  
  
"Yeah, I didn't think Lee and Neji were the kind of guys that would like ana-"  
  
"AHEM," Iruka interrupted Naruto, "So I believe that if we confront her about this, we can force her to stop. Her only technique can't harm us."  
  
"Right, she's show that bitch the what-for!"  
  
Before the two could go back for a confrontation, there was suddenly a loud explosion! Whirling around, the two missing nins, Zabuza and Haku came jumping down from a rooftop, with Leaf ninja close behind!  
  
"Wait... you two are dead." Naruto spoke aloud, seeing but unable to believe it.  
  
"omg they are stronger than b4!" Kakashi appeared suddenly. Iruka jumped in surprise.  
  
"Kakashi! How are they still alive!" Naruto asked, desperate for some answers.  
  
"there power lvl is 1 million!" Kakashi said, looking with his Sharingan as if it had the added ability to tell such a thing.  
  
"What the hell is a power level?" Naruto asked, even more confused.  
  
Before he could be answered, Meri-Su bust out of the top floor window of the building her and the Hokage were in. She did like 40 flips in the air and landed in a cool pose behind Zabuza and Haku.  
  
"I won't allow you to destroy my village!" she said fiercely.  
  
"We'll see about that!" Zabuza yelled, and Haku sped towards her.  
  
"Forbidden Technique: Neko Wai Wai Sugoi no Jutsu!" Meri yelled and performed a series of complex hand-seals. She began to glow and suddenly PRETTY, PRETTY ANGEL WINGS GREW OUT OF HER BACK, THE COLOR OF VIRGIN SNOW. With a shower of feathers, Meri-Su knocked out Haku and teleported in front of a shocked Zabuza.  
  
"I'll show you the error of your ways! Luw Luw Revolution no Jutsu!" Meri said and performed more hand-seals. A heart-shaped beam flew from her hands and into Zabuza, who's expression turned from fear to deep regret. He walked over to Haku's prone form and picked him up as if he were a small baby.  
  
"Oh Haku, I luw you." he said and kissed the boy on the lips to 'seal the deal.' The crowd of people that had grown started to cheer.  
  
"Naruto," Iruka whispered, "we need to confront Meri now, before things get even more out of hand!"  
  
"Let's do it." Naruto said, eager to stop the insanity.  
  
They quickly walked up to her, unnoticed because the crowd was too busy congratulating Zabuza's heroic display of love. Meri had changed back to her non-angelic form and turned when she felt someone tap her shoulder.  
  
"Hmm? Oh, yes boys?" she said, turning around and facing the two stern looking ninjas.  
  
"The gig is up, Meri, if that's your real name!" Naruto said in a menacing tone.  
  
"We know your using some advanced form of genjutsu, give it up now and it won't come to violence." Iruka threatened.  
  
"Oh my, what ever shall I- GET THEM!" she jumped back and pointed a finger at the two of them. The crowed turned as one and immediately pounced on the unsuspecting duo. Although they put up a valiant fight, the last thing Naruto saw before getting knocked in the back of the neck was Iruka being dragged down by a pack of ninja.  
  
Naruto woke with a start. He attempted to rub his eyes but couldn't move his arms. Looking down at himself, he realized he was tied to a pole. To his right, Iruka was just coming to as well, similarly bound to a pole. All around them were the citizens of Konoha, as well as the ninjas-turned-corpses-turned-lovers Zabuza and Haku, that were looking at one another in a way that suggested they had more than a teacher/apprentice relationship. Meri-Su stepped forward, hands on her hips, a smug grin on her face.  
  
"Well that was exciting!" she said, "But now its time to pair you two up! Dolphin-teacher, you of course are going to Kakashi-sensei." Kakashi could be heard squealing with delight somewhere in the back of the crowd.  
  
"As for you, Naruto-kun, I think you'll be with..." she put a hand to her chin in deep thought, "Kiba AND Akamaru sounds good to me."  
  
"Me too!" Kiba yelled out, while Akamaru barked.  
  
"No! Oh hell no!" Naruto struggled against the hemp ropes, desperate to get free.  
  
"I... I'm sorry, Naruto." Iruka said, mournfully.  
  
"Now, time to get the pairings underway! Luw Luw Revo-" she was cut off mid-sentence by a flying kick from a very angry Naruto.  
  
"I've had enough of this! Stop this shit right now!" Naruto screamed, the Kyuubi's chakra flowing through him. He stomped towards Meri's prone form, the crowd parting out of fear. What Naruto saw surprised him.  
  
Meri had changed from a raven-haired beauty to a fat, young woman. Girl, rather, she only looked about fourteen or fifteen. Her hair was about to her shoulders, and was obviously dyed blonde. She wore a t-shirt that was much too small for her, with some kind of big-eyed red-head girl on the front with the words "Hook-Ups" under it.   
  
"Kyaa~!" Meri screeched, "Someone help me!" All of the demon-fox's chakra drained from him, this was the biggest display of sad he had ever seen in his life. Before he could make any sense of what happened, a man started pushing his way through the crowd.  
  
"Move it, move it," he grumbled to himself. When he got to the girl, he roughly pulled her up by the arm, "Young lady, you are in deep trouble!"  
  
"Otousan!" she slurred out the phrase.  
  
"Speak English like I tell you, damnit! And for all this I'm taking away your internet for one week!"  
  
"YOU CAN'T DO THAT YOU'RE NOT MY REAL DAD!" she screeched back.  
  
"Yes I am Goddamit, I'll get a blood-test if it'll shut you up with that shit!" The girl's father yelled to her, forcing her to walk with him.  
  
"What the hell is going on?!" Naruto himself screamed.  
  
"Yeah, yeah sorry 'bout this folks, I'll take care of this." The man said.  
  
Suddenly, a gray box popped up into the air above them, with words inscribed on it.  
  
Confirm File Delete - Are you sure you want to send 'me in naruto!1!' to the Recycle Bin? Yes No  
  
A white arrow floated up to the 'Yes' and made a clicking noise.  
  
"Everything that happened here will be undone." said the man, slowly disappearing with his chubby daughter.  
  
"I regret nothing!" yelled Zabuza, before 'poofing' away.  
  
"It was a good ride!" Haku yelled, then going back to the dead like Zabuza.  
  
"Oh thank God!" Lee said, seeing Neji walking towards him.  
  
"k thx." said Kakashi  
  
"What the hell was all that?!" Naruto yelled, then there was a loud ringing noise.  
  
Naruto bolted up in bed and slapped his alarm clock off. He was panting and covered in sweat, like he woke up from a nightmare. Taking a few deep breaths, he slowly got out of bed and went into the shower. After changing into his clothes and eating, Naruto went out to the woods where Kakashi had told Team 7 to meet him, although he had a feeling of dread as to what he would find. Getting to the spot, he looked and saw...  
  
Sasuke, leaning against a tree, and Sakura sneaking peeks at him. Naruto was too nervous to say anything, and half and hour later Kakashi showed up, being ignorant to the fact that he was late. They went out on a simple mission of helping out a small farming community, all the while Naruto felt like things were out of place. Team 7 returned to Konoha in the evening, and once free for the rest of the day Naruto bolted about the village, looking for people he knew.  
  
When he found them, they were acting completely normal. By the time Naruto finished up some of his own training and was getting ready for bed, he forgot about whatever it was that made him worry all day and have a nice sleep.   
  
The End! 


End file.
